“Anger as soon as fed is dead- ‘Tis starving makes it fat.” Emily Dickinson
Asking someone who is mad “What’s underneath the anger?” has become such a widely accepted catchall pseudo-caring response that I fear being outcast for suggesting otherwise. It patronizes, rejects and invalidates the person’s feelings and tops my list of rock-solid evidence that dumb questions really do exist. A psychotherapy session on the TV show Law & Order: Criminal Intent beautifully illustrates my point. Read the full article here.
